My Kid's Growing Up

     It is an inevitable truth that we are all getting older. We are getting older and I doubt that we are getting much wiser. However, this fact has never really manifested itself in front of me in the way it has over the last two years; back when my son was firstborn.

     Nothing in this world makes me feel as young at this moment has having an almost two year old son. He is full of energy and emotion and reminds me constantly that things are never quite settled. I see so many flashes of brilliance, both mentally and in personality, that I can hardly keep count of what he does. He has so many amazing personality traits and so many things that remind me of both my wife and myself. He is sharp, loving, and quick to an emotional response, just like we are. 

     I don't know if I would have ever really believed in things being "genetic" until I saw my son's temper flair up this last weekend. Something he was trying to do with stacking objects on one of his trucks wasn't going just the way he wanted and he melted down. Throwing his arms and giving a frustrated shout. I would imagine that this isn't unusual for most toddlers, but something in his cry of frustration reminded me so much of me that it was scary. The way he sounds when he is frustrated is the same sound I hear in my head when something isn't adding up the way I want it to. This means that my kid is more sponge-like than I like, or he really will have a disposition towards quick anger. 

Uh oh. 

     The thing I love about my kid growing up is that he is experiencing everything for the first time. He's experiencing emotional events, games, activities, all for the first time. I love it. I love seeing him respond to these events with no expectation as to what they might be. Shouldn't we all be so lucky as to not walk into situations with too high of expectations so that we are not constantly underwhelmed. I envy his ability to experience that rush of excitement when he is seeing or learning something new. But it is an extremely exciting and satisfying feeling when I get to see him experience these things. 

     I know that I will not always be this happy to experience things with him. His first heartbreak, the first time he confronts the concept of death, when he's cut from a team, or not cast in that play, I know that my heart will break for and with his. That's some of the beauty of it, however, that no matter what happens, I will be able to see him grow. I want him to always want to grow in his life and experience new things, even if they are heartbreaking sometimes. 

     Being around my son reminds me that I am getting older. My body can't do all of the things it used to do, my bedtime is earlier, and I have to make sure I drink more water and less of other beverages, and my hairline is running away faster than a car with no brakes. If I am going to be reminded of my impending senior-status, I'm glad that it's by this awesome person that's in my life every single day. I look forward to watching this guy grow up and become who he wants to be and to see what impact he has on his world. 

     I'm confident that I won't be disappointed in the result, and neither will you.

Best,